First and foremost, let me tell you how proud I am of you. You surround yourself with crazy, freaky people doing crazy, freaky things, and yet, you do none of it yourself. Your mouth goes before your brain most times, but you do stop and think before you act, which keeps you on the straight and narrow.
That said, I do now feel the need to explain a few things to you. Listen closely:
1. Contrary to what you and your friends believe, your mama ain’t dumb. (Don’t worry though. I was way smarter than your Gramma, and many others, back then too, so it would appear you’re perfectly normal.) I’ve walked a day or two in your shoes, albeit in a different generation. Some things are harder for you, but others are just the same. For example:
a. Junior high girls are bitches. (True to this day!!)
b. Keep your nose out of OPB! (“Other People’s Business.” We had our own cool acronyms in our day, too, you know!)
c. Don’t let your thong panties show above the waistband of your pants. (Oh no, wait. That one is specific to your generation!)
2. As much as you try to blame me for it, I am not responsible for scheduling badminton, baseball, soccer and cheerleading all on the same nights. Although, perhaps I should have warned you that life’s difficult decisions would begin at some point, rest assured that as long as we both come to the same conclusion in regard to prioritizing your life, all will be good in our world.
3. Talking (yelling) about how grown up you are and then rolling your eyes, stomping your feet and slamming doors is a total contradiction. You should stop that.
4. You really need to watch what you are eating, without becoming a walking eating disorder statistic, that is. I don’t want you to have my issues later in your own life. And issues like mine are happening to people younger and younger these days. Just be careful, that’s all. And for the love of all that is Holy, don’t eat nachos and cheese, with a side of white toast, waffles and chocolate before bed. That might be a good place to start a change of habit.
Okay, I’m done now. Have a great day at school. And yes, I’ll email all your coaches and let them know when they will be graced with your presence. And yes, I’ll pick up your grad dress after school. And yes, I’ve confirmed with Devyn when and where I will be picking him up. And yes, I will pick up Friday the 13th for you and your friends tonight. And yes, I will pick up some snacks.
Thank you for allowing me to do all this for you. It is a privilege, you can be sure.
Love Mom
xoxo
7 comments:
My dear Rhonda. Do you remember when I wished that you would have a daughter just like you? Well now you have. And I hope she turns out to be the wonderful friend to you that you are to me. Love you, babe!
My dear Asia. Everything your Mom said. That stuff has been true for more generations than we know. But we understand how tough it is to be a teen. Thank you for keeping your head on straight. And of all the decisions you face, this Grandma hopes you pick the cheerleading. You're so good at it. Love you, babe!
Let me just go on record here and now and say that Asia is all her father!! Holy moly!! Cassie will be this generation's version of Rhonda. And Olivia? Oh, she's so bad, I don't know where SHE comes from!! She's going to be the most difficult of all!
Olivia will be a mix of you both! :) That should be interesting to watch........
Oh how I miss the days, of screaming, fighting, giggiling, self involved teenage girls! :)
I can`t even believe I wrote that!
Dear Rhonda,
You are a perfect mother because you had a perfect mother!
Love,
A good-enough Mother!
aka Ronda
Dear Asia
I don't know what you did and years from now no one will remember... but This too shall pass and some day you won't be able to talk about your Mother and all she has done for you without crying! Trust me...I know!
Love,
Not-the-Mama
aka Ronda
Ahhhh! That is a sweet, practical letter that I'm sure she'll appreciate when she has kids of her own LOL! Isn't it so true though? I totally wish I had listened to all the great advice my parents gave me. Amazing how we really do know what we are talking about sometimes, huh?
Also... thanks for stopping by my blog. I, too, have a high set diamond. Mine hasn't fallen out yet, but I have been nervous about it at times.
Seriously, we are living parallel lives.
Oh that was good, so good you could sell this letter as a template for mothers of teenagers across the world. And I loved what your Mom wrote, bought tears to my eyes Rhonda. My sister has three girls who are similar ages to yours. I just checked the oldests Facebook page last night, YIKES!!!!!!! Um, every parent should cehck their kids facebook pages, I found it disturbing..and I have wiped the memories of my daughter as a teenager. You do forget..
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