My life in pictures, stories and open letters.

My life in pictures, stories and open letters.

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Saturday, January 01, 2011

My 11 New Year's Resolutions for 2011

  1. I would like to accidentally write 2010 on patient visit sheets only 37 times, which is half my usual, before figuring out that it is actually 2011.
  2. I will get a signed agreement from Olivia that for the remainder of the winter she will only lose left-hand mittens so we can at least make mismatched pairs.
  3. I would like to unclog my bathroom sink.
  4. I would like to be a nicer, kinder person. Except to those who don't deserve it.
  5. I would like to lose 40 pounds, but failing that, would at least like to weigh less than my dog.
  6. I will try really hard not to make nasty assumptions of the person in front of me driving the Toyota 30 kms below the speed limit.
  7. I will try not to swear as much.
  8. Scratch number 7. I'm just setting myself up to fail.
  9. Stop calling Baba a nasty old hagbitch. (It's okay. I'm not that mean. She's not MY Baba.)
  10. De-clutter. I mean, really. A husband, three kids and a dog?? One's going to have to go.
  11. Take on 2011 with an open mind and lots of laughter. It doesn't ALL have to piss me off. Or at least people don't have to actually SEE how much they annoy me.


June Freaking Cleaver said...

Finally, a realistic list of resolutions!

Thanks for my first blog laugh of the year.

wy-not said...

Bloody, frickin' hilarious. And real. I always like real best of all. You are a hoot, like your mama. Except your mama is just funny-looking. You're funny for real. Real. Love it.

Anonymous said...

Love them all!!! You are great!!

Sistergirl said...

That was funny.

Here is my quick remedy to lose some weight, oh I just buy something a size larger. lol

Lilly said...

And I reckon that you will achieve every one of these. You are so bloody hilarious! Love it and reading you!!